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owldee:


calling out slut shaming hells yes

owldee:

calling out slut shaming hells yes

unthinkable-viii-xxi:

Xx
ACTUAL SUMMARY OF GREEK MYTHOLOGY
Zeus: im gonna put my dick in it
Everyone: dont put ur dick in it
Zeus: toO LaTE

oroxine:

poyzn:

There is someone out there for everybody.

It just might be a goose.

roboboners:

jayda95:

all-because-we-fell-in-love:

floozys:

vagina’s are able to stretch wide enough to give birth to a fucking baby and then return to it’s original size but of course being penetrated by that grass blade you call a penis is what’s going to make it “loose”

Uhh. The baby doesnt come out of where the penis goes in…

stay in school y’all

i hate to be the bearer of bad news but the vagina and the vagina are, in fact, the same thing

If I were really really ridiculously wealthy, I wouldn’t buy a mansion, just tiny apartments in every city I love.
Mara Wilson (via jechantepleure)

crownflame:

pansysky:

spookytox:

reaill:

grimfemme:

I just wanted to eat breakfast ;(

welp now we know the distinction between the two

Have….have people…not eaten shredded wheat before? The regular sized ones?

You put it in a bowl and pour milk on it (with sugar + cinnamon if you’re not some lunatic fiber satan who just wants to eat wheat strings) and let it soak a bit before breaking it up and eating bite sized portions with your spoon.

DO PEOPLE NOT KNOW THIS?!

NONE OF US KNEW THAT

why do you think they’re called mini wheats? LOL

I didn’t exchange any bodily fluids with anyone, so I’m not worried about it. I’m much more likely to be mistakenly killed by a police officer in this country than to be killed by Ebola, even if you were in the same bridal shop.

avatarparallels:

Who do you think you’re talking to?

put-him-in-custardy:

this is how Parks and Recreation explained Chris Pratt’s weight loss for Guardians of the Galaxy